Atheist's World

We knew that for the next 12 days we wouldn't be eating any salt. I was ok as I thought its just 12 days, its just gonna fly away. Wishful thinking, I bet it was!! That evening just passed by eating lots of oranges, few apples and a couple of potatoes with sugar and black pepper. There were quite a few people who would stay there all night long giving us company. Its a belief that the soul of the dead body strays around on earth for 13 days and hence the rituals (kiriya) for that many days. Only upon completion of the rituals, the soul heads for the heaven, so it is said. During these 13 days, the immediate family members who are in kiriya are considered impure and are supposed to be vulnerable to attacks by the straying soul. Hence, people giving us company or simply kurawas . The next day began with the Brahmin waking us up early in the morning. We were to take a bath. Never in our (me and my brother) lives had we taken a bath early in the morning that too with cold water. We a

As my dad's body lay sitting cross-legged on the wall, me and my brother sat in either flanks. With the rooster's call, the new day dawned on us and my head was filled with turbulent thoughts. I approached dad's eldest brother and informed him about my decision of not doing the rituals. Within minutes my decision was ridiculed upon, and I was branded an outcast. I was given a choice that I could either choose to leave, not being allowed to carry the family name any further or just carry on with the rituals. Of course, they gave me half an hour to make my decision. Honestly speaking I could have just got up, carried my bag and walked away. I didnt give a rat's ass to what people thought about me. I wouldn't let anyone dictate the terms of life to me. I decided giving a last glance towards mom before I walked away. I could see her still red-eyes full of tears just looking at me intently as if to say, "please, don't go away." Then sister came to me and wh

Since dad's passing, I've had some harsh realizations. Life in itself is nothing but a mere journey. All of us are travellers who co-incidentally happen to just bump across each other. With some, the journey is brief, with a lot of others it is even briefer. The only real destination is either the funeral pyre on which we are burnt to ashes or the ground beneath where we are laid and fed upon by the maggots. Getting good grades, landing a good job, owning a car, owning a house, falling in love, marriage, settling down, having kids, having a family are all the norms of life. It was done in the past so its an unwritten law and meant to be just followed. No questions asked. When something is done repeatedly over a period of time, it automatically becomes the law of the nature. Its like the points of attractions you have on your travel guidebooks. So, they are a "must do". If a guy/gal decides that he/she doesn't want to get married, he is considered either insane o

I went inside the ICU and although I was briefed about his situation, I wasn't ready for what was laid in front of me. There was my dad in the state of drug-laden unconsciousness. His semi-bald head covered with hair longer than I had ever seen them. His always dyed hair was almost all-grey. His beard looked like someone had carelessly chopped them off. He was almost engulfed in a mess of wires and pipes. His arms had ballooned off and there were hardly any space without a prick mark. His chest was thumping in an unusual and artificial manner because of the ventilator pumping air in and out of his lungs. I called out "baba" a couple of times only to be met with the slow humming noise of the ventilator. I then had a lengthy discussion with the doctor. Apparently, dad's both lungs had collapsed to such an extent that they were not able to breath in enough air, hence the ventilator. His blood pressure was very unstable. His kidneys were also affected and he was a known d

Always kept telling myself, EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED and yet today when I am at CROSSROADS LEADING TO NOWHERE, I realize that I ain't prepared to accept that LIFE INDEED IS A NASTY BITCH! However, on second thoughts, I ask myself what would I have done if LIFE WAS A SMOOTH SAIL. I know not the answers. I don't pretend to be the ENLIGHTENED ONE. All I can say is yes, LIFE'S BEEN A BITCH and ITS SCREWED ME WITH ALL ITS MIGHT but I have enjoyed every minute of it so, HELL YEA!! BRING IT ON BABY!..I dare you and I promise you I'LL BOUNCE BACK EVEN STRONGER!

The frowns of middle-aged men and women, the kids sticking their tongues out ever so slightly, the gutsier ones requesting to touch and feel them, some express their complements, while some dare with their disparagements some turning their heads to get a second glance all in all am enjoying the attention ..one year of dreading and still going strong.

Basking on the morning sun on my little patio, Rolling a joint with a chilled Kingfisher by my side, couldn't start the day any better. Getting messy eating the crabs, the sea food platter The gorgeous view of the sea and, the sound of waves lapping against the shore. All of it is washed away like the sands of time All that remains now is memory, a mere memory. Missing GOA.

Its been almost a year now that I've not updated anything on my blog. Not that nothing's happened worth mentioning. On the contrary, I just haven't had the time. My travel experiences to Goa is incomplete and the diary is languishing in some corner. My dreads are almost a year old now. Now with the change in shift timings and more importantly a comp at home itself, I guess I can be more regular at blogging but no promises, yet.